Im trying

Im trying to be friends with someone who, not in my wildest dreams, can be friends with me. I don't know, I just have this burden that I need to be friends with that person.

I made the move also. Exerted effort. But... I guess, its not yet the right time.
Although I admit I'm not also totally healed from the past experience but I'm opening myself to a new and sincere friendship.

Last night, I was talking to God, asking Him why I often think of that person. Why I still have the burden. But I told Him, if its not the right time, its not and asked Him to help me forget and unburden. " It'll come.." I said to myself. As for that human being.. "Maybe when the bitterness is not there anymore, even the pain. You only know that your not hurting when you can't remember the pain anymore."

And as for me.. "I can't remember the pain anymore, BUT everthing's still in my memory. "
I guess what I want is a genuine relationship with that person. But if its not meant to be, it won't happen.